Alright Already

I have wrestled with the decision long enough, and now that I have discussed it with my parents, it’s okay to talk. I have decided to return for another year of work at the school in Cambodia after my visit home. I don’t know if it’s crazy or not, but after trying to answer “why”… the best I can come up with is that it simply feels like the right decision. I was determined to head home for good and start looking for jobs… but I just don’t feel like my time here is finished. Maybe I have more to give to the students and staff at Goldstone, maybe I have more to learn about the country and the culture and the people living here… and maybe I just have more to learn about myself. I have been worried about impact, but a good friend helped me realize that we have an impact on the people around us just by living and loving and giving what we have...almost by accident sometimes. We can have impact anywhere. We simply make a decision where we are going to spend our efforts and our time. And I just need more time here... not becaue I don't want to be somewhere else. It has taken such a long time to build relationships with the teachers and kids at the school…I finally feel like I’m at a place where I can offer something. I’m not worried about how to get to school anymore or any of the other things I had to adjust to. I have a better understanding of the students - their levels, their abilities, and the weakness that need to be addressed – and I’m starting to get the education system here... not happy with it, but getting it. I’m not going to fix anything in a year, but I can contribute to a foundation on which someone else can continue to build. I’ve had to do a lot of learning first – not that the learning will ever end. So I’ll get to spend a month and a half at home – which is actually more time than I have had at home in a LONG time – and maybe even find a way to visit again next April during our short break. I’ll start saving pennies. Regardless, I can’t wait to get home now… only a month left! I’m excited to sit by the fire and swap stories with anyone who shows up in the backyard. I’m gonna plant myself by the river and soak up every ounce of love I can get.